What's the spread in the Puppy Bowl?

Obviously I'm not posting too frequently these days and this isn't a particularly inspired one. But I might as well publish my Superbowl prediction. After careful deliberation in the car this morning, I settled on Pittsburgh winning 21-13, which has them covering the spread by one point. I said it wasn't too inspired. Since I'm already writing this, I guess I should pick an MVP while I'm at it. Ummmmm... Santonio Holmes? That sounds about right. With Hines Ward hurt, Holmes is the Steelers' biggest offensive threat. Couple that with the fact that he'll probably return a few punts, I could see him going for something like 6 catches, 150 total yards and a receiving touchdown. That's all the enthusiasm I can muster for this game. My money is on the Steelers but my heart is with Arizona. Here's some more bs I feel like throwing out there for potential "I told you so" bragging rights after the game:

Cardinals X Factor: Anquan Boldin. The Steelers are sure to make life hard for Larry Fitzgerald and people seem to have forgotten how good Boldin is. He spent half the season playing with multiple injuries that sideline most humans for months and still managed to put up Pro Bowl numbers. After two whole weeks of recovery time and questions about his potential attitude problem, the stars seem perfectly aligned for him to blow up in this game. He's also the toughest receiver in the league and has the perfect style to outphysical the Steelers' D and knock them off their pedestal.

Steelers X Factor: Ben Roethlisberger (man that name is difficult) gets this label for all the wrong reasons. I'm actually a big fan of his and think he's vastly underrated, but his job in this game is to not do anything stupid and let the defense win the game. A lot has been made of his poor performance in Superbowl whateverstupidnumberthesteelerswon. If Big Ben tries too hard to redeem himself for that he might just end up blowing it for his team. Also don't be surprised if he goes down with an injury and Byron Leftiwch is forced to step up. Roethlisberger gets hurt a lot and reports of x-rays this week have me worried he might still be feeling the effects of the concussion he suffered a few weeks ago.

Best side effect of a Cardinals win: None really. Almost no one in the Cardinals' predominantly bandwagon fanbase deserves this. Shout out to Drew Brooks, who may the only true Cardinals fan in Arizona. Actually, one benefit of a Cardinals win is the increased likelihood of Kurt Warner leaving for greener pastures or possibly retirement, greatly increasing my chances to win my bet with Edmund that Matt Leinart will start at least one more game in his NFL career.

Best side effect of a Steelers win: America is forced to confront the uncanny resemblance of Mike Tomlin and Omar Epps, leading to Omar Epps starring in "Steel Resolve: The Mike Tomlin Story" on ABC Family.


Dude, stop being chubby, down to earth Omar Epps.

Worst side effect of a Cardinals win: Kurt Warner gets a national stage to peddle Jesus to the public. Listen, we know all about Jesus. Nobody cares if you love him. Just thank him and let us move on with our lives.

Worst side effect of a Steelers win: Even more pissant bandwagon Steelers fans in every major city. Where do these people even come from? It's like every douchebag that grew up more than two hours from a major sports city suddenly finds a way to be a lifelong Steelers fan the second the playoffs begin. You think that James Farrior jersey is fooling me? It's not. Go back to Des Moines and bring you fair weather allegiances with you.

Just to reiterate: Steelers win 21-13 and Santonio Holmes gets MVP.

One last point: How does Larry Fitzgerald not have a nickname? I'm all out of funny so I won't put any ideas out there, but this guy needs to have a nickname by the time next season rolls around.

Enjoy the game if you can. My goals for Sunday only go as far as hoping to get drunk enough to stop caring by the 4th Quarter. GO YANKEES!