"These conservative kids don't fuck or get high like we do"

Currently a panel of 3 judges is attempting to decide the outcome of the 2008 Minnesota Senate race, deliberations having begun the week before last. One might then assume that there would be a decision in the upcoming week, but such a person probably lives in Sweden, where I hear things are somewhat reasonable. I feel like the chances of a ruling happening this week are too good to describe as "optimistic at best", but much worse than "possible". If I was writing a mad lib, this sentence would be replaced by "But I'm no ___" (give me your best noun, political pundit).

I am positively underqualified to write mad libs.

If you are a Franken fan, the good thing is that for once in the shameful history of electoral courtroom battles in America, it is the Republican who is challenging the final count. Granted this "final tally" succeeds its fair share of recounting, but as far as our collective attention span goes, it could easily appear that Coleman is the sore loser. There is some recent precedence-in 2004, Christine Gregoire (D) won a recount challenge over Dino Rossi (R) in Washington, and eventually became governor.

Currently, Franken has won the election by 225 votes. It should also be noted that if Norm Coleman loses this ruling, he may appeal to the Minnesota State Supreme Court. I can't say for sure how many exact avenues there are to continue on with challenging the count after that.

I'm happy for these reasons:

Coleman got in by winning an election against last minute fill in Walter Mondale (Reagan's 1984 opposition) after popular incumbent Sen. Paul Wellstone died in a plane crash days before the 2002 election. Coleman probably would have lost had the news media not framed the Democrats' selection of Mondale as an untimely act of joy and ambition, at a time when mourning would have been more appropriate.

Coleman is a right wing hawk trying to disguise himself behind a moderate's mask, but he couldn't possibly ever cast a vote that didn't vacuum at least a little bit of humanity and decency out of our world, and who sweats moderates that much anyway?

He switched from the Democratic party to the GOP while in the middle of his term as mayor of St. Paul.

While opposing the Vietnam War in the 70's Coleman issued the quote which is the title of this post. Not surprisingly, he's since felt binded to vote for the Iraq war and oppose the legalization of marijuana.

In December, I told this woman who lives in Minnesota that Franken was definitely going to win, even though he was behind at the time. She confidently disagreed. Then I made two shots in a row in pool, fradualently acting like such an act was somehow commonplace in my life.

Perhaps this photo would be more appropriate.